Everyone assumes that when a man leaves his family, his wife will have to go to work, even if she never worked before. Many assume that she'll have to rely on government programs. But when it happened to me, I asked God if it really had to be that way. I asked if He could do something different that would allow me to stay with my children, who needed my physical presence more than ever. I asked Him if it was possible to live through a divorce and come out on the other side more financially sound that when I started the journey. I asked Him if His church could care for us in such a way that we would not need food stamps or Medicaid. My God, my Abba Father, did just that, not in the way I thought He would but so much more generously. I have been very careful not to speak of my needs to any but a few trusted friends. I wanted to be certain that any provision I received came from God and that I was not in any way manipulating people or playing on their sympathy.
I need to explain a bit about what God brought me through over the past 2+ years. I knew when I first prayed that I was asking a lot of God. In fact, I really thought I was asking too much. When I asked Him to allow me to stay home with the kids, I honestly expected to have to work full time, and I very badly wanted to be responsible for my bills. I knew, too, that any child support would not last long. So I focused my prayers on a job that I could work from home or work around our schedule. Within 2 weeks of my husband leaving I began a part-time cleaning job that I still have. And month after month, God took care of our needs, sometimes from friends who knew of specific needs, but often through friends who said simply that the Lord told them to give, and sometimes through anonymous sources. I watched the months progress and was amazed that I was able to pay my bills every month, even working only part-time. God was obviously answering my prayer in a powerful way, but not with the job I kept expecting Him to give me.
A good friend encouraged me to meditate in scriptures that related to my trials. So I would recite Psalm 34. "Young lions do lack and suffer hunger, but those who seek the Lord shall not be in want of any good thing." Or Philippians 4:19. "And my God shall supply all my needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." God very clearly wanted me to see that He is a God who keeps His promises. In spite of His great love and miraculous provision, I struggled through this time, wondering every month if there would be money to pay this bill or that one, and wondering when He would provide a job so I could pay my own bills. As time went on I slowly began to understand that the Lord wanted me to trust Him, rather than my own efforts, to provide for us. Every step of the way He was teaching me something new about His faithfulness, His absolute trustworthiness, His extravagant love for me.
So here I am today. I have finally submitted myself to "walk by faith and not by sight," specifically as it applies to our needs. As I have done so He has begun to provide more work for me, and has also freed me to be more open about our needs. If the Lord leads you to bless us in some way, you may find two posts on the side bar helpful. Current Needs is where I will list needs for which I don't currently have any way to pay. Wish List is where you will find items that aren't needs but which would bless one of us, or all of us. I intend both of these to be a place to list items only after I’ve prayed about making them public.
Now to Him who is ABLE to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. (Eph. 3:20-21) AMEN!
Posts
